Do you think they could tell I was high on that conf call?
If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
So instead of cumming in her, I peed in her...
What did she do!?
I didn't tell her...
Why did u sent me a picture of a dead horse?
i could hear you having sex and was jealous, wanted to kill the mood
I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
i woke up in the lobby of Holiday Inn on a chair sitting up straight
The girl in the white might have stds. I'm strangely okay with this.
well, someone with very low standards is getting their dick sucked
The taxi driver was cool until you left. He then started blasting enya and telling me I look like I need another line.
Any chance you used one if the curtain rods in the fireplace room as a sword? One is missing
there is nothing ok with the fact that that was the 4th time i peed in the same parking ramp
She's calming us down by shoving oreos in our mouths
well you don't shave your pubes into a handlebar mustache and keep the party to yourself
Why do I have "apologize to Dave Coulier" written on my hand?
Randomize
