my mom just found my bong and asked what it was. I told her it was a hookah
and she bought it?!?
yeah...but her friends at work told her hookah was fun and now she wants to smoke it with me...im thinkin yes
Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
why did they invent bidet's? your butt gets clean when your poop falls in the toilet and splashes up anyway...
I wonder if there will ever be a day where I don't find lisps really really hilarious.
i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
I feel like I spend my weeks apologizing for my weekends.
yeah the cable guy is coming and everybody is hiding all the pieces in the house. we are up to thirty two. like a fun game of smokable scavener hunt.
HOW IS IT EARTHLY POSSIBLE TO DO THAT MUCH DAMAGE WITH JUST MY THUMBS?? HOW???
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
Can we go to the gas station to get cigarettes before we get drunk. It's hard enough to say Marlboro sober.
Well its all fun and games until you get naked with your ex in the shower. that's NOT flirting
I did coke with the Royal Navy last night. God save the queen.
Getting blackout drunk infront of my family was never on my bucket list, but now that I've done it I'm cool with it.
I swear I only fuck him for the huge bottle of smart water he gives me afterwards.
Randomize
