Oh, don't even get me started. Harry Potter is so pure. Twilight is just teenage girl porn.
today was the first day of rush. talking to girls all day makes me sick of having a uterus.
dude my 8 year old cousin is allowed to drink wine coolers. as long as its infront of my aunt. wtf
I know. I just don't want anything else. I have no other desire. Just a ham sandwich.
I honestly don't know what to make of that.
A ham sandwich would be nice.
I mean, we started to hook up but my asthma attack kind of killed the mood
if there weren't so many witnesses I 100% wouldve punted that squirrel
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
He wrote on the paper that he wanted a "Ptitty burreto" from taco bell...when we ordered it the girl paused and entered "Potatoe burrieto"....we laughed
I think I was the only one who knew you were acting like you weren't drunk in public issues discussion this morning. Make sure you thank me in your Academy Award Speech someday.
My liver and my bank account can't afford another all nighter. Help.
Stocking up on Wasabi powder. Nobody's tampons are safe.
I'm six Popsicles away from an existential breakdown.
You grabbed my dick don't call me son
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
You took the glass microwave plate and said it was the closest thing to a frisbee, let me know how that works out for you
Randomize
