Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
Earlier, I saw a homeless man that looked like Abe Lincoln, and I just saw a guy walk past wearing crocs and socks. I'm beginning to like this city less and less
Some bum walked up and watched me getting head last night for like 5 mins before I noticed him
I spent all day at the mall with her, then she made me actually watch a walk to remember then decided to tell me she was on her period. This one is either really crafty or I am really desperate.
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
There's something really special about 3:00 in the afternoon drunk that just can't be duplicated at any other time of day.
you kept telling her you'd make a great step-dad while cuddling her and rubbing her back...
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
She makes walking on a treadmill look like a porno. I wish I could send over shots as an ice breaker.
That's effing brilliant. We should start a business.
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.
It's nights like those I refer to my life motto: You can't be just friends with someone after you've seen their genitals.
Someone drunkenly cleaned and organized my car last night... Nothing's missing, so that's a plus.
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
after attempting to eat a candy cane bigger than my hand i have determined there's no way to eat this that doesn't seem erotic
She yelled Carpe Diem when she orgasmed. Is it too early to marry her?
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