and next time when you feel me up, do it right
he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
Apparently I added "small children" to my likes on facebook. glad to know that's where my subconscious is at.
The extent of my physical activity is running from the cops.
Last time I stayed at my moms my fucking car got set on fire sooo maybe I should think this through.
Are we doing anything tonight after class for Valentine's Day or just being lazy and having sex?
If you expect me to say anything other than 'lazy and sex' you're crazzzzy!
We'll talk about this tommorrow when I'm not mistaking my fingers for French fries....
Oh jesus...leave it to you to hit on not one but two guys who can't fuck you till marriage.
In the future, could you not call me 'bro' while we're having sex?
My roommate walked in naked grabbed my hand and pulled me into her room to see her randoms dick.
I WOLD FCUK YUO INTOO THE MOON
THE MOOOOOOOON
First encounter with a mirco peen. I was confused when he said he doesnt go down on girls. Cmon dude, practice on a peach.
Did I seriously answer the door for a home delivery of weed from you and your boss while wearing last night's 80s rockstar face paint?
He is a real estate investor who’s face I’m going to sit on.
Ha. Yeah that's all I found you with this morning. Butt ass naked w my robe across your lap and your arms thrown back in handcuff position.
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