I slept with some guy because he drew a dinosaur on my arm
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
SEE! I KNEW I HAD A LONG-TERM REASON FOR BEING A SLUT!
He made fire alarm noises before throwing up all over the street.
cashier rang me up and said, "white people are funny." like i'm NOT the only white person to buy just lettuce & 40 glow sticks
She's planning a December wedding, I'm planning on a June breakup.
Wait... All I had to do was ask for a sandwich and you would have come over
Her instagram is literally selfies, cats, and guys she's fucked.
All I've consumed in the last 24 hours is cranberry vodka and kosher for passover biscotti
That's what happens when you party with the tribe
Is it completely inappropriate to base my morning after pill purchase on if they sell coffee or not?
Tried to shave my legs but the rug burn on my knees from last night got in the way.
I might need to come puke in your toliet on the way home
We were driving past a farm when he screamed at me to stop the car, then he jumped out and tried to ride a cow.
I found condoms in the back yard from you and your boyfriend. My house isnt a motel
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
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