I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
If it looks like I didn't change from last night, it's because I didn't.
Stripper fight on main stage. It just happened. And it was glorious.
I took your shirt off for you after you threw up on yourself, read you the ugly duckling, and then tucked you in. you better fucking love me, jackass.
He's in bed with me right now. I'm wearing a towel and all I could wish for is my freedom. And pizza.
Between the plague n the counterfeit drugs we brought back from mexico I'm not thinking too highly of their country right now. Screw mexican homeless men.
I'm trying not to drink. I may fall down if I move. This is bad. I had everclear before the bar. Oh no. Oh no. Breathe. Breathe. Breathe.
I am not going to ask my mother to pause a movie so I can have phone sex.
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
Can I come over? I respect you, but I want disrespectful things to happen
Well am going to a strip club before sun down, I dont think anything good can come from that.
you haven't really lived until you are in a situation where your vagina is hanging out
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
i am rolling on molly so fucking hard i want to do 300 cartwheels
He understood my need for pizza was more important than my need for sex. He's the one.
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