if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
The best part about the NBA starting up is I get to see Charles Barkley make a fool out of himself for 8 months
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
They should try giving mcdonalds to cancer patients because it just cured the worst hangover ive ever had
Take my keys. Load me into the vehicle. Drive. Get food. Come back. These are my demands.
Exactly. Because my vagina can't be consoled with words. It requires a thicker form of communication
I may or may not have shit out a layer of my liver after that weekend.
You got the whole drunk bus to sing, "In The Jungle" while conducting with your glowsticks.
Wow, im gonna be a great doctor..."hi let me save your life but first check out this pic of me deep throating a handle of grey goose"
He sent me a picture of his dick earlier so now we can all laugh at him tomorrow
Dunno why I keep hitting snooze. It's never gonna give me the kind of sleep I need to be sober.
Nothing like coaching 5 year olds with a bunch of visible bruises from last night's drunk bondage sex.
I just put Gatorade in my wine, cause electrolytes, you know.
There is nothing wrong with watching parks and rec all day then getting blackout drunk by night
Im going to hell I gave him a handjob on the plane next, to an old guy playing video games on his iPad, on good friday.
Randomize
