just found out there is no tactful way to ask your girlfriend to wax her stache. no matter what a google search would have you believe.
it felt like a thousand fairies were licking my balls.
The hookah bar is playing i'm on a boat. I believe in god again.
Completly hung over at midnight, I knew there was a downside to drinking at 2pm
as he left, i held up my fist and said "pound it out" and he was like "are you serious, we just had sex..."
So the bar isnt gonna put that broken window on my tab. appaerently they want cash
well we could tame deer to let us ride on them. does that work?
I think off duty cops drove me home. I may have been hitchhiking
Why isn't there a sort by hair color option on Facebook? It would make stalking much easier.
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
He smells like cinnamon, and what I imagine to be orgasms
Never go with a hippy to a second location. I fucking hate Xanax.
We woke up today with 24 donuts, a tie, two jugs of vodka that we traded an extra sandwich for, and a british boy
Let's just say, I will never again lick an asshole.
I never knew it was coming. He was cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, and then BAM! Best hookup ever.
Randomize