We were doing it doggy style, and I puked on the floor and started crying, he told me it was okay his cat would eat it... and if it would make me feel better we could do anal...
And they lived happily ever after....
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
Note to self: Not getting laid all weekend makes girls in mondays classes racks seem enormously bigger.
He's pole dancing on a heat lamp.
If the EMT's ask later... I had 5 hour energy for breakfast and Four Loko for dinner... It might be important for them to know that
With any luck I will spend the duration of this flight with my tray table up my seatbelt securely fastened and my face in his lap
Three things I need a picture of: your friend, your bong, and your dick.
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
Don't talk to me about scholarly dedication until you've taken a final in boxers, a bloody tank top and a zip tie to hold your hair back. I wear the most sullied 4.0 crown of all time....
Hey man, sorry about punching you in the face, also about turning the shower on you. I just really wanted you to drink some water.
So note to self oboe reeds soaked in Apple Rubinoff sound GREAT.
OMG -- There are strippers in the bathroom crying because their power moves aren't good enough to win the competition
And as the acid sets in, he looks back at the shallow form he used to call his and whispers "3 pee pees strong"
Bro I needs to be rescued in 30 mins...prfeebly someone died in a car accident needs to be the excuse
This lady is talking to me and all I can think about is getting face fucked and doing cocaine. Not neccesarily together and not neccesarily in that order
Randomize
