I know, he also has a fancy car to make up for his tiny penis
how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
Now I have to picture Dave Letterman having sex with all these women. Im the real victim.
i've never heard her scream louder than when the koreans scored. what am i lacking in bed?
A-plus on my thesis. I deserve the blowjob to end all blowjobs. And I wanna wear a crown while you do it.
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
I've decided that my night was probably over when I started eating the penne vodka with my hands.
Is "sorry I booted you out mid-fuck last night" a good icebreaker?
We play beat the clock every morning. When the alarm goes off, she hits snooze and drops her panties. If I can't finish in time to beat the snooze, she jumps in the shower and I've gotta jerk off.
My code for I need help will be if I'm holding a bud light lime..
I woke up at 4 am. Literally pissed. No idea what happened. I could have fucked a cow.
You must be buzzed on Miller Lite.. Zen master advice is flowing
Coming straight to your house after the flight. If not in Federal Prison for disobeying peanut laws.
Randomize
