Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
i may or may not be hanging out with a boxer who has a daughter tonight. and he just spelled "honestly" like "onistly". He has prob taken a few too many hits to the head but he's hot at least.
If my boyfriend wants to eat his own jizz after masturbating, what does that make him?
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
So he told me he didn't have a condom, paused, and then said "so, pulling out" and tried to high five me.
My afternoon will now be spent googling genital warts. I think my life is over.
broke the door off of my fridge tryin to have a indoor rodeo
I'm in the city buying alcohol. I just got warned by a homeless man on the street that I shouldn't look so pretty "in these parts"
AND BY FEELINGS I MEAN VODKA
The $10 cab ride turned into a $60 cab ride when you puked down the back of his seat trying to whisper in his ear. He was a trooper though, he came into to wash off in the sink and still tried to get your number.
If thou doesn't answer thou phone thou shall receive a barrage of Dick pics. It's the eleventh commandment.
Also, being stuck with my family all week has made it very clear that I need to be drunk and I need to be fucked pronto
You set fire to his cat.
In my defense, I did not think it would be in the trash bag.
Do you ever just admire your boobs?
I smell like a mix of alcohol, sweat, and sex and its only 10 AM
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