i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
I'm at his house. He has VELCRO shoes. I'm too desperate to leave...I may need help in thee life dept
i've counted 4 condom wrappers but only 3 condoms. not again.
They have to be talking about me. I never heard that statement until I was born.
You finger a girl once and she thinks she loves you. I'm going back to boys. Lesbians are needy.
dude, seriously he just sucked the milk out of the dogs breast and swallowed it... for $20, wtf....?
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
2048oz a keg...divide that by solo cup... comes out to 128 beers...simplifies into 5.3repeating cases...drinkable between two people
and u failed math?
There was booze on his face and I wanted it. I'm not sorry.
WHAT GOOD IS APPRECIATING IF NOBODY'S NAKED
She's high and running across rooftops. Yes we're going to end up in A&E again.
That moment when your mom is so drunk she makes you get out of bed to lay in her bed because she thinks it feels like sleeping on a marshmallow peep....
I could be the Kenny Powers of Sex Therapists.
sometimes i forget what nice tits i have and then i spend a month brushing my teeth naked in the front of the bathroom mirror, and i remember.
like honestly, the vodka had to go somewhere, and your moms soap dispenser just seemed right at the time..
Randomize
