how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
when i spit it made a heart shape. i think it's a sign
An accidental pregnancy to a guy with a trustfund is no mistake. It is a gift from god.
It was so weird. I had like an out of body experience. I heard the moaning, but I didn't know it was me.
I just masturbated to the audio from my psych lecture . . . this screwing my prof fantasy is getting serious.
I have to date her. We need a place to stay when we go tailgating.
I really wanna know when trying to grow up turned into try not to throw up.
I will tell my future kids about the time I went to the bar with a stomach virus. Like a champ.
At some point i could of swore that you were in my bedroom riding a manatee last night..... I like my new dealer
I've started a list of places i want to drink. To go along with the list of places i want to have sex. Lincoln's log cabin is on both.
The only excuse this guy at the club had for trying to make out with me as soon as I met him was "I AM FROM MEXICOOO"
I found out his moms name, maiden name, profession, and office location, his dads name and profession, his home phone, picture of their house, all of his work profiles, and the cost of their house. All I'm trying to do is find his damn twitter
He made the moves first, we made out...then we folded his laundry.
Hey what are you up to?
I am wear the people with the mustaches live. I have found their home.
DUDE, WE BOUGHT THE ACID TOGETHER.
He spent three years trying to get a chance with me and finally broke me down. then he came in two minutes and was so upset he locked himself in the bathroom so I helped myself to his weed and left. Wanna get stoned?
Randomize
