ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
just woke up in a hotel room.. realizing its the hotel i work at.. lets see how this walk of shame turns out
I love the moment a guy admits defeat against the front clasping bra.
My 10 year old son gave me a bottle of jameson for fathers day. Did you have something to do with this?
Tonights theme there is the 7 deadly sins. Greed, envy, sloth, gluttony, sluttiness, fellatio and vodka.
I just walked by a party bus on my way to study. God hates me.
Pretty sure encouraging you to sleep with 2 different girls while keeping you in the good graces of both has lost me the ability to call myself a woman. But that's just the kind of friend I am; dedicated.
Can I bring home a duck? Dead serious
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
He smacked my ass so hard my ass cheek looks like Wilson from Cast Away
For whatever reason, whenever she's drunk off Crown, all she wants to do is jerk me off with her feet.
We ran out of toilet paper so Ive been using coffee filters
Dude just walked up to me, gave me his number and said, if this number ever calls its my penis,better keep that one handy. I cant lie its the best pick up line ever, im calling his penis.
You said "I feel like a koala bear. Do you ever just feel like a koala bear?" This is your brain on drugs.
Randomize
