Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
At barnes & noble, drinking beer out of thermoses, lookin legit.
I hope his life after cheating on me is as good as Tiger's golf game is these days.
Be still, my beating vagina.
You were sitting on the filthy kitchen floor eating a packet of grated cheese, and you were crying because you couldn't find any cheese.. I'd say our party was a success.
Okay so, sorry but last night we had to put a note on your chest and a key around your neck just so you would make it home.
You yell at me for giving you beer but not for licking spilled beer off your chest.
should we try and roll a cross joint since its good friday? you know, for jesus
ive decided that just saying "yes" when people assume I am something other than Caucasian will highly benefit my love life. last night I was native.
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
DIBS on your mom for my beer pong partner.
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
As a side note, can you ask the maintenance staff not to drag their balls on our stairwell handrails. Please.
If you survived your 72 hour masturbation marathon put on some pants and come over. My mom dropped off a lasagna.
Randomize
