So I'm sober and underage, being hit on by a groom-to-be with braces...is it a bad thing that I'm enjoying it?
I think dad's getting high again. His last google search was "awesome ping pong shit."
The weird kid in front of me is reading an article titled "why don't i have a girlfriend?" the article then continues to talk about the mathematical equation for obtaining a girlfriend. exhibit a of why he is single
we need to drink 2009 down the drain
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
It's 8 am and he's already trying to get me to make out with a girl.
They ran through the sprinklers in front of campus police, shirtless. Singing "love is a battlefield"
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
Just realized ive been sitting through all of lab with a condom in my bra.
yay hump day
I guess the study abroad went badly, I gave him a joint and he just smoked it and cried all the way from the airport
I had to convince someone last night that the fact that he couldn't get me off wasn't him it was me and to clarify I had to tell him there was only. One person that got me off every time without fail, he said "that guy is my hero" you should be proud
He realized that I was watching deadliest catch while we were jerkin off on FaceTime.
She had never heard the term "grundle" before. Classiest girl I've met in months
He just said Bill Nye is just a dude. If I ever considered sleeping with him, I never will now.
So I'm trying to figure out how to talk my boss into allowing pajama day once a week. Any ideas?
Randomize
