i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
My roomate just said the he would "tap dat" to the 13 out of control girl on maury. Im finding a new place in the morning.
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
I woke up in the penthouse and did lines off the to of the fireplace. This is not real.
I got a Luke Skywalker costume so I can go do battle with the homeless guy who plays the fiddle dressed as Darth Vader downtown.
I think I actually have rug burn on my eye.
Her facebook status said "just got a sign from god". I texted her and apparently she found a slice of pizza in the shower.
You almost married that.
Yes. We drank 3/4 of a handle of vodka, fried and ate a 3lb package of bacon, I tackled the neighbors snowman, made snow angels in our underwear, and then fucked all night. Christmas success.
Def just threw up beer then brushed my teeth with some randos toothpaste now back to drinkin beer
Just let me take your liver out and beat it with a meat tenderizer for you..
So far I consider it a great summer because I have had to buy Plan B a total of zero times
Mind if I sleep with your cousin? If I can... thanks. If no, sorry its gonna happen.
Like who turns down taking a nap inside of someone in 2014.
im drinking out of a pineapple, so yea.
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
Randomize
