I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
He muttered something about having just washed he sheets, then demanded I give him all my quarters.
thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
She goes outside, smokes 2 cigarettes, and insists on walking up the 7 flights of stairs so that her heart stays in shape. this woman is crazy.
he sent me this 10 second long video of a gorilla eating a banana on my phone. no explanation. I didn't even have his number. just. a gorilla eating a banana.
I am not saying a eulogy for your vibrator.
You tried to sled down the middle of the street. In. Your. Coat. Of course you are bruised.
I made him breakfast and we cuddled on the couch watching march of the penguins, which is, in case you were unaware, the opposite of fucking on a pool table
I'm so glad I got to use the word gutterslut before 11:00a today.
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
Well I can't go home with anyone tonight bc I stuffed my bra
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
The selfie stick gets 5 stars bc it really added a fun element to my sex tape
The work outs are working. Someone just said my body type was “Tits On A Stick”.
Randomize