There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
I think my vagina is haunted
Definitely got drunk and sent her a literal picture of my asshole. I titled it " you"
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
seriously, i am too high for the omelet station to be playing Being For The Benefit Of Mr Kite at 7am
on the list of things i learned today that are not stripper poles: ex-boyfriends, table legs, and police officers.
seis de mayo is my least favoite holiday because i usually spend it in bed sobbing over my poor life decisions from the night before.
To tired for the bar. Came home and drank wine out of the bottle. Kind of don't want to know what that says about my life.
i need to stop celebrating other people's birthdays like they are m own.. my body can't handle a birthday every week
I cried singing "call me maybe" on the way home from the bar. What the fuck
casual night just sitting in the kitchen at 2 am eating stale chips and hot sauce while my friends younger sister is cleaning all the blood off my body
Filthy. I need to be power hosed with holy water.
Pretty good. Thinking about getting day drunk and filling out job applications so I don't hate myself as much
I TAUGHT HER CAT TO SIT. CATS DON'T FUCKING SIT ON COMMAND. BUT THIS ONE DID!
It's basically my crowning achievement.
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
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