It was kinda weird being the boss
Did you feel like Tony Danza?
Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
can "i'm close!" be our safe word(s)?
oh geez, wrong person.
Wow.. I was doing a mental check of my bank balance & I literally just said to myself: 'I have 27 dollars and a bottle of tequila til tuesday-ill be fine'
life lesson #1: a fart during an awkward silence between 2 strangers doesnt make it less awkward.
I think I'm on the verge of a really slutty period in my life
Judging by her face, I'd say she's at least dabbled with meth...
i took it, then realized you live 3 ours away. but if you start driving now, im almost positive I'll still be hard
First booty call in Europe.. In Barcelona. With a German. In broad daylight.... Is that how they do it here?
Do you know anyone with a stuffed cougar? I want one for a self portrait to hang in my house. A bobcat or lynx might work too.
Is it considered a bad morning to find your boss half naked in the parking lot of work at 7am?
That depends, how hot is your boss?
there's a 50/50 chance the night will end in alcohol-induced rituals of satanic nature
You’re about to have a sober threesome with a rando at a Fenway bar?
all I want for my birthday is booze and sex toys. don't bother calling if neither of those are included.
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
Randomize
