we left the bar for like 10 minutes last night and moved his car so it wouldnt get towed. neither of us have a clue where it is right now.
On my list on ridiculous morning after bus rides home, still sopping wet and carrying a giant straw hat is definitely top five
He literally stopped in the middle of sex to look up sex positions on his iPhone...
No. No, there is no forgiveness for this. The only way I'm forgiving you for this is if you somehow convince your sister to have sex with me. In her car.
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
I really wasn't that bad. I thought I was pretty tame.
When Anthony passed out you poured vodka on his face
You fed me pizza off a sword last night.
I would just like to go ahead and accept my slut of the year award.
It's like 10 times better than an Oscar
I just woke up naked next to a GetGo sandwich and I can hear my cats are eating my combos. So that's my life.
The struggle bus crashed, rolled down a mountain, and went on fire, and I was on it ugh.
oh man that would be weird.. i feel like we should do dirty things before anything super intimate like a massage.
i don't find him as attractive when he's dressed as himself...bring back Indiana jones and I would so fuck him again
I told you for Halloween we just need to let the loins free! Let the girth come to us in a flock, drenched with passion!
what happened to you last night?
I dunno man, i pissed in a urinal, sent you a picture of my vagina and woke up with 25 bar stamps on my arms.. you tell me
Facebook just reminded me of the time I found two IHop cheese sticks in my hand bag. Those were the days.
Randomize