I think condoms have that nasty latex smell to remind you in the morning of how gross you are.
I cut my penus on the lid.
she said, and i quote, "i want to black out with my rack out"
Already puke and ralleyd and dressed like a bear.
rolled over to window for cup of snow instead of leaving bed for water. that's how hungover
I heard him crying and I heard him listening to porn... I'm hoping to God they weren't at the same time.
Honestly bro, I can't look at girls you've banged. Its like looking herpes in the face.
Can we please get through at least one night out when you DON'T threaten to have sex with one of my parents?!?!
Grandpa got a dui while riding a horse. This is what I need to live up to.
Oh yeah. I pretty much fucked the universes brains out lastnight. It was glorious.
Rock bottom: having sex rejected while your boyfriend talks in his sleep as you stuff your face with Girl Scout cookies
just ran into my father at CVS while buying condoms...he winked at me. I really need to move out of this town.
She was cleaning herself at the bus stop. She also picked up gum off the ground and ate it
Got a blowjob while watching James Bond's "Octopussy." My 13 year old self would be so proud
I just slept for fifteen hours straight. It's like my body knows i'm drinking with you and is preparing..
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