So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
i just fell asleep masturbating. I'm no longer surprised i'm single. I can't even pleasure myself.
He has that cheese in a can and he's eating it. I have never seen that outside a goofy movie.
My mom said I should get that 'not fucking anybody' problem fixed.
I'm too drunk to be surrounded by this many indians
How do you manage to be drunk and a racial minority so often?
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
You have to wear the princess leia gold bikini every Sunday
That's actually a fantastic idea... The kinky sex dungeon will be vastly improved by the addition of a lightsaber
I convinced a shit ton of people I was a russian foreign exchange student to get free drinks. I knew learning those accents would come in handy.
It sucks laughing and vomiting at the same time, trust me. I kind of remember
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
Then I'll go home and you two can do whatever two same sex heterosexual soul mates do
I don't think he cares about your inhospitable uterus.
i just watched a 27 minute video about owls...that high.
Hey I need you to run the morning meeting, for reasons I can explain when I find out where I left my car
Randomize
