I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
i'm almost one hundred percent positive that i have a warrant out for my arrest in this city. i also don't give a fuck because im drinking TEQUILAAAA
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
The cabbie told us to at least pretend we weren't doing coke while he was driving
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
see these eyes, they just want to bone and go to sleep.
Mitt romney looks like a fantastic lover (full disclorsure: im 76% vodka right now)
You're lucky you got out when you did, about an hour later the girl in the Franzia box started wrestling everyone.
I'm trying to be celibate. I'm having me time. I'm eating cake.
DO YOU REALIZE HOW AWESOME MY GRANDMA WOULD BE IF SHE GOT HIGH
Eat, nap, & pace yourself. Words to live by.
The guy I blew who bought us all the shots last night? I really think he's the TV guy I'm watching give the local weather. Like right now.
There are flour footprints all over the house. Either u guys are trying to pull that Paranormal Activity shit on me again, or u got drunk and tried to make pancakes.
Well. Another one of my exes came out of the closet.
I just watched a magician wearing a fedora deep throat a balloon\n
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