i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
haha you were so trashed that you deleted all of your christian music from itunes and kept saying"c-ya God, nice knowin ya"
Who would have thought the night we were surrounded by 4 cops would be the most responsible night of the week.
It's been a long time since I felt this bad on a Monday... and for that, I thank you.
Idk. I woke up marinating in beer on my beanbag. Idk what you mightve done.
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
Trying to take a shit right now to the beat of the fuckin drumcircle outside... It's not goin well
do you know how hard it is to walk a mile drunk on 151 it's hard yards are soft and every girl looks good
And I just had to awkwardly tell 3 police officers that I was having sex and not in any trouble
The amount of guys who just came into the room to give me a high five after hooking up with him was about 5 too many.
You stole a fry from a complete stranger. He wasn't happy. Then you said fuck it and stole the whole poutine and ran down the street while he stared in shock.
Dude if I call tonight please answer and just say "NO, dont do it."
BAT SHIT CRAZY
It's you're fault, even though I never called
Bitch guess who just got a fucking taser
turns out my ex girlfriend has become my most successful wingman. life is fuckin weird sometimes
Randomize
