Whoa Z and x make the same sound
You put your red cup in a chain link fence and kept telling me you could use it as a telescope
Was just explained ingredients in a four loko. Puzzles of the universe starting to piece together.
Please stop leaving drunk voicemails with your new black/Irish accent.
She said " I'm going to get her back one day soon for putting extacy in my pop while I drove her to whislter" just a heads up.
just woke up under a car ? That's odd
Holy fucking shit
WAIT BUT IM WEARING A BACKPACK THAT MAGICALLY HAS 30 BEERS IN IT
We looked in every room for condoms... It was the sexiest scavenger hunt ever.
Yea we just broke up
so do we start sexting now or later?
You gotta buy me dinner first. Or smoke me out. Both are equally chivalrous
I'm going to try and loofah my hangover away.
Update: It didn't work
I don't want random pictures of your morning wood. It's like, what a glorious morning oh a penis.
I've got enough liquor to do one of two things on Friday: 1.) Drink myself into a coma or 2.) lay in bed a drunk and cry lonely mess. Happy Valentines Day.
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
So Saturday night after 10 drinks I guess he tried to have sex with me and in the middle of it I asked "can you tell I'm faking it!?" and then I sat up and threw up in my hand. That's a sex Win in my books
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
Randomize
