did you know they have Ed Hardy school supplies at Target? it's like folders and notebooks for little douchebags in training.
Dude you can't like a status about me getting hit by a car
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
I just realized I'm not towing a trailer. I thought this whole drive home I was towing a trailer. Wow too high
He told me I was a pleasure to arrest. That's the 2nd time I've heard that.
She keeps telling me I can't keep feeding the dog my food. I gave half the weed brownie to the dog and half to me. I just want it to taste the greatness of cheezits like I am.
The things i do for you...I put all those condoms on a bed, complete with girl, and you sleep in the bathroom
I asked to see his balls for medical purposes.
I feel like asking for a towel for after I puke before I puke to be more respectful than jus going outside to puke and coming back inside covered in sweat and tears.
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
he accidentally put it in my ass, i liked it but didn't tell him that and "accidentally" took his weed.
Thanks for ruining my life with your man penis
Memeber that time you got detained in Poland. We don’t talk about that enough
Steven and I talked about running for office again today. It's fucked that my 3 dream jobs are marijuana bakery owner, bar owner, and president.
Umm I might be late. Also I am may or may not have mayonnaise on my ass
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