I dont shave on purpose to keep myself from being slutastic!! it usually works
dude i woke up to 20 missed calls from you, 3 from a blocked number and had 13 voicemails that all said "send me a picture of your tits."
so im guessing thats a no.....
I just found cold cuts in the blender. You and beefeater can no longer have unsupervised parties.
The fact that I woke up with my panties on the counter and a piece of pizza stuck in my sheets is what scares me.
Alright, I can go by eventually,, I don't wanna lose a second pair of shoes this semster from blacking out...
I'm on the struggle bus
just ordered a number 1 at a fast food restaurant that doesn't have numbers
But the guy you're fucking should not be within ten pounds of your weight when you're five fucking feet tall and he's 6'2". That's all I'm saying.
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
I choose McDonald's breakfast at 1:28am over sex anytime
Dude my pants were only on for 20 minutes after she got there.
That's 30 minutes too many.
Note to self: if you decide to go to the gym when you're coming down from your day high to shoot some hoops, do NOT play pickup basketball with the big black dudes who need a sixth
well considering the guy who just delivered my cookies had to console me as i had a mental breakdown in front of him i'd say i'm 4/10 right now, thank you
What are we just gonna be those girls that get fucked in your parents basement and not get taken to dinner? I don't wanna be those girls.
So high I legit spent 20mins in the shower just holding my tits cuz they feel bigger than normal.
I gave him one of my famous hand jobs.
Randomize