Can Purell be used as lube?
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
we had to stop you from eating moldy cake.. twice.
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
she texted me out of nowhere. and I wanted to get drunk. like I didn't even have her new number until 6 hours ago and bam we were rolling around drinking cotton candy vodka from the bottle she had stuffed in a boot
by the end of the night two people were passed out at the table, three on the couches, and one in the bathroom. it looked like someone pumped sleeping gas into the middle of a dinner party.
Hey nothing wrong with those! I can't believe the guys who let me see where they live on first dates. Even more surprising, I don't stalk them after they've done me wrong.
I've been there a week.. I'd rather all my coworkers not know that I'm already sleeping with my boss.
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
sober me is the one who makes bad decisions every boyfriend I've ever had I met sober
Sensing a theme here
If alcoholism is a theme, yes.
Just ate Panda Express. Fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I actually prefer this. Less broken dream potential.
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
I'm literally the definition of crunk, sunburnt, and dehydrated. I'm going to die tomorrow.
I may have passed out and puked all over the host's favorite couch, but three hours and a rip later, I was eating tiramisu in the bathtub with the birthday boy and a hot Italian.
Randomize
