Just saw a man jogging. For recreation. At 3am. Who's he training to be, batman?
Don't leave without me in the morning. I keep scaring everyone cause I'm sleeping in the bathtub.
I just got a booty call..Its 6 pm..a brave attempt to climb the rotation ladder..I like his ambition.
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
My lips are red and swollen. Solid proof that giving head is a viable alternative to lipstick and plumper.
Got a handy at the foam party. Took girl home. Banged her. Thanked her for foam handy. "what handy?"
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
I was galloping around pretending to give birth to pbrs. I could have used a mask.
If she's over 40, she won't believe you if you say " I'm only going to put the head in"
Dude he took a shit in the lake and it just floated around and lingered near our boat for 2 hours. I fucking hate that kid
My dad told me to bring weed to easter Sunday dinner..
I'm torn between wanting to wear lipstick and wanting to make out with strangers.
Yeah I either headbutted a street sign while texting or I defended you two from an evil gang of nazi muggers. I was black out so I am gonna assume it was option b.
He said I was so drunk and high that I had a conversation w/ his goldfish. The video shows me clearly conversing as if talking to a person w/ pauses in conversation and everything
Would an open wound count as good sex or bad sex?
Randomize
