can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
I may or may not have melted a dent into the top of my minifridge with my hot glue gun, which I left on for the past couple hours unsupervised, while we were on our salvo/savers excursion. Welcome to Halloween in college.
I can do anything tonight that doesnt involve an erection.
i just saw some one pass a baby through the drive-thru window at dairy queen.
Hey wes just called me saying he was asleep outside by the pond at my apt complex
Eric and I just went in the hallway to practice our new handshake in a real life situation at live speeds. That high.
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
Woke up in her bed this morning with a half used condom stuck to the side of my face
How can a condom be "half used"?
I'm just chillin on the bathroom floor
Haha oh no
The bathroom floor is like my second bedroom on the weekends
Its like I've been given a sexual blank check.
I just jerked off in front of my dog to make him jealous of my thumbs. There are consequences for stealing the last cheeto!
Three Asian guys got on the elevator with a handle of Hennessey and a sleeping bag. This is not the start of a joke.
I don't trust him but hanging out with him might be fun
he's literally satan but yeah probably
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
Randomize
