hey babe. i'll pick you up in my mom's car. with my mom. she has nothing to do tonight.
The saltiness of my tears mix perfectly with the tequila.
I'm going to do lines of vitamin c I cannot be sick for halloween
Passing out is my livers way of protecting my mind.
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
We can Fuck in the shower to save time
And this is why I like you. You're so damn innovative.
So im waiting for someone at grand central and i look up AND THE ENTIRE BALCONY IS FILLED WITH BOY SCOUTS I AM TERRIFIED
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
Last night must have been awesome because I went to get in the shower only to find the bat symbol drawn on my chest
That happened during battle shots lol
I'm going to three dry weddings this month. I'm flashing three dry weddings this month
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
Is her dick bigger than yours?
ever bang a guy wearing an $800 suit? today you will.
I feel like this is something I should shave my legs for
Why did I wake up with BYOB sharpied on my stomach
Yea he was still drunk. He wore a Toga to his job interview.
Randomize
