morning outfit: hottub soaked skirt. no underwear. someone's bandanna worn as a shirt. took me an hour to walk home. this isn't fun anymore.
Waaait I'm alsleep in myt car somewhere
Sorry if I ruined your sex last night with my constant text updates about the plot of Bolt.
i feel like a lion cub that has been breast fed for years, and mom has left, and now i have to learn how to hunt on my own
of course. lets lasso hookers.
did i mention he attempted to milk her in backseat?
Those titties aren't worth a lifetime of listening to her talk about gluten free yams and japanese manga.
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
Tomorrow may or may not be a problem cause i'll be wonder woman for a halloween party aka i'll be fucked up & try & jump off of shit thinking i can fly
Well he walked in last night, yelled at me for not playing any music and started dancing.
Drunkness level: fluent in olde norse
I think we've gotten passed awkward... the day I woke up at the palms and ur getting eaten out by the dude who just fucked me on the balcony.
he was making out with her against the stove and started a fire--the thirst literally almost burned the place down!!
It's okay that we broke up and all but it's not okay that he still has my Chick-fil-A calendar card. This month is free fries!
Ok next time we are filming it. You bring the camera and I'll buy more socks
Randomize