census says that i am hotter than the girl you just left with...sad for you
singing james blunt while drunk. tell me thats not wonderful
The girl behind me at the dollar store said couldn't wait to get her permit, then requested a pregnancy test. God I love being home.
Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
Go ahead. I tried to back up ur budhism story but she mite be catching on
Dammit. I hoped that would work. Just tell her I'm doing my pilgrmidge to Nepal or something.
It's safe to say that bucket of tequila night can NEVER HAPPEN AGAIN.
Well, I tried to shit into my refrigerator. It was a rough night.
Unlike bears, this weekend is not the #1 threat to America. It is, however, the #1 threat to my liver
I am incapable of maintaining a guy's interest in me. It's like erectile dysfunction but with feelings
I hope you get your threesome on vday. I'll probably get flowers and a candlelit dinner. trade you. I wish this guy was more of a slut and had less of a heart. I would like 2 dicks please fuck your flowers!
Would it be sad if I made a blanket fort to get drunk in till the power came back?
My frontal lobe is being piloted by Jack Daniels right now.
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
I'm the kind of gay who carries his anxiety medication in case the club scene gets too fierce
The guy next to me on the bus has one hole in his jeans that has over 20 mini dicks drawn on his leg. Classic.
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