if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
I decided to name her "day after thanksgiving" because I am sure I just got someone elses leftovers.
Springtime is officially here. I just used pool water to fill up the bong
I cant leave dude. theres a horse with a top hat on
Right when he gets off the plane they're going straight to a party where you're only allowed in with a bottle of whisky and they are given bullet proof vests.
It was more like a tour de entire bottle of wine in 14 minutes
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
My going away gift was all of them dancing around with solo cups on their dick and balls...these are my friends
I'm approaching homosexuality at an increasingly alarming rate with each break up.
This holiday season is going to be rough between people coming home for the holidays and the already regulars on my list I might have to clone my vagina to make sure I get everyone for all they are worth
My roommate was tripping balls last night, he kept me up all fucking night
Roommate? Please tell me you're not calling your cat your roommate
If I don't have tequila in my hand soon, I'm going to have to violate human rights laws
So here's a brief summary of my weekend: last night I drank four glasses of Death Punch, grabbed the toaster, said "This is mine", put it in my pants and walked out the front door.
If there was a category for "most likely to end up a serial killer" in your high school yearbook then I'm sure you would have won it
Who died my cat blue again?
Randomize
