Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
I'm basically sure i was the reason for glitter on his penis
i walked toward the cop car thinking it was the liquor store lights nd by that time it was too late to escape the trap
I wish I could go back in time 3 years and tell my freshman self how easy it is to hook up with freshmen
I wouldn't take my shot so you poured it on my face. Twice.
Between the plague n the counterfeit drugs we brought back from mexico I'm not thinking too highly of their country right now. Screw mexican homeless men.
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
We were in the hot tub...he ate the pizza pocket directly out of my mouth
my boss just accepted "because it's 4/20" as a legitimate reason to take Friday off
I just went into a strangers house to have a spoonful of sugar to cure my hiccups, wtf is wrong with me
my dad pointed to my full beer and said drink up we're leaving now.
can you adopt me?
You leaned over so she could squirt ketchup in your hair and then started chanting "KETCHUP NIGHT!! KETCHUP NIGHT!!!"
if i ever wake up in the morning and don't feel a boner in my asscrack then this relationship is over
Got stiff armed by the garbage man on the back of the truck...I just wanted to ride one block dude
I'm about to do something based solely on the fact that a fortune cookie told me to. This may not end well.
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