They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
New Low: Just set a reminder on my phone for me to check on things I need to harvest late on Farmville.
Woke up this morning 8 levels higher in Call of Duty then when I started drinking... told you I was better when I was drunk.
Don't be a smartass. I'm trying to fuck a guy who's sober. It's more difficult than you think.
My vagina is scared and excited at the same time. It might not be able to sleep tonight.
he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
She was blacklisted from the Uhaul center...what the fuck do you have to do to get blacklisted from a Uhaul center
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
It's not a good night until someone eats a bagel covered in face mask thinking it's cream cheese
Ye. Looking like it's about to be one of those mythical responsible weekends
At some point i could of swore that you were in my bedroom riding a manatee last night..... I like my new dealer
You were passed out in the OutBack Bowl Shrimp costume and when we asked you wtf happened you just said On Wisconsin.
I mean, I bought pot and shampoo before I ran out. I think I can adult.
Drunk him got in a fight with his wife he literally bought a plane ticket and flew to Hawaii. He just called me and asked why I let it happen. From Hawaii hahaha.
Finding my pants in the morning should not make me this proud
Randomize