can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
I hope you had to get up out of bed and walk across your room to check this text message
it was better than the time i puked and I forgot to open the lid of the toilet
Don't worry. I told him just because you've gargled some balls in the past doesn't mean you'll be handling his.
I really wanted that to be shared. Thank you.
If is anything like my past relationships, I have no doubt that I will single-handedly reignite the Cold War
"I wasn't planning on buying a chicken, but I bought it anyway." --some guy on the bus with a chicken
"Yeah, I only have nine toes." --that same guy
You screamed "show me a dick stand!" But before I could ask you wft that was you had passed out in the corner
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
What do you mean you don't want me to steal the manikin do you have any idea how expensive inflatable dolls are I can't get that for your birthday
You know i love you, but i just cannot fuck you until your eyebrow grows back. It's too hard not to laugh.
Woke up in a cemetery. Puked in front a funeral ceremony that was going on.
Not all of us can be into hot dads. Some of us have to have commitment issues and be into musicians.
I sent him a topless photo and he complimented my eyes. I'm not sure if I'm offended or pleasantly surprised.
i hooked up with all four beatles on halloween get on my level
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