I swear if I see one more guy in a v-neck and fedora I'm going to punch someone in the balls. This is philly, you're not supposed to look like Ryan Cabrera
My cat gives me a boner
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
Please tell me how you drunkenly remembered your social security number when we were checking you into the ER.
I'll be there. With Doritos and whisky. Don't expect much more.
watched two friends get underages. one had a shirt on that said lets get wasted while the other said to the cop "i understand your just trying to do your job but that was dirty bro".
Everything smells like vodka and bologna. WHAT DID YOU DO?
Just got flashed by an entire bus of girls in school uniforms. We then had to wait beside each other at a light. It was awkward.
I've been here for three hours and I am already feeling sorry for whatever offspring i will indefinitely produce in this place.
I pray for you bro.
I just can't even fathom the crazy and I work at a mental hospital.
Seriously bro? Indoor roman candle wars? I guess I'll never see that fucking security deposit again
And you are going to be so turned on by my batman skills later
But I only have 2 emotions angry and horny
He makes bad life choices and drives a wagon, how is that not my type?
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
Randomize