you spent the like half the night trying to figure out the puzzles on the back of the captn crunch box
I woke up with ten beers in my bag that hoarded at the party last night. Rally? Its five somewhere.
First day at work... I clogged up the office toilet on purpose to assert my dominance.
the liquor store owner came out from behind the counter and kissed my cheek when he saw that i am back for fall semester
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
Found crayons in my cigarette pack. I can't help but feel you may be responcible.
he broke into my appartment and left me a waffle maker...
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
I have acquired 14 pictures of hard dicks tonight... I was on a mission. Don't even pretend you aren't proud.
Did you make me take pictures of your ass last night because you fucked on some wet paint or did i dream that?
He was so hammered. He called the cops on the landscapers he thought they were trespassing. 2 were arrested on warrants.
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
like honestly, the vodka had to go somewhere, and your moms soap dispenser just seemed right at the time..
Dennis picked up a 50 year old woman. Then he and Dan got in a fight and jumped out of the limo. No one knows what happened to them.
Randomize
