Gte hit a new low, I took a poopnap, passed out mid poop on the toilet.
My mom came into my room and told me to flip off the tv. I gave it the middle finger. Note to self: STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
You're just telling me nice things because you came in my eye.
Going out so taking the 2nd 1/2 of beer w/ me ont'tube in a Pringles tube. I give money to people on the street that have more self respect.
The girl that works the front desk at my gym invited me and my friend to come see her Tuesday during her shift at hooters because its her birthday. I still have a boner
You didn't hold all these dicks to become a party planner!
Oh god. I asked to "play his sexaphone" which I though was a super sex way to say "let me blow you". He fucking walked home at 4:30am
First stoner thought of the day: Life would be so much better if there were more things that were biscuits and gravy flavored.
When you were bringing him upstairs I told him to bring you on down to pound town. you're welcome.
WHAT GOOD IS APPRECIATING IF NOBODY'S NAKED
I need to mount that unicorn and turn him into a full blown steed.
Thanks for coming over. I'm sorry everyone else was vomiting. Thank you for not vomiting. I love you.
You know that gay bartender? Not as gay as we thought.....
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