actually, I'm a sock model
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
Nothing says walk of shame better than a onesie and a 12 pack of corona..
karaoke mosh pit has descended into fisticuffs, send backup
I'm currently day drinking, studying and making corn. Don't tell me what I can't do.
Telling someone to make good decisions on a Thursday is like telling Santa to be Jewish.
cops woke me up on the sidewalk and asked where my shoes are.. fuck if i know, im sleeping on the sidewalk! actually i didnt say that, i just cried until they gave me a ride home.
He tried to stop traffic by waving his half eaten pizza at cars.... And we were stupid enough to cross .....??!!!
I think Jabba the Hut is dying in the stall next to me.
When she says 'Polish hangover cure' she just means more vodka. Don't do it.
The convent might be a nice break from real life
I REALLY NEED TO STOP CELEBRATING THAT FUCKING HOLIDAY
Just rode a bull topless for a free bar tap for a month
Got home. Somebody tried to sell me weed on the street. I've never had to try so little to find a dealer before.
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