i may or may not have been spotted by tourists while getting head in the vicinity of the jefferson memorial
I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
i thought i was pinching her nipple. It was her mole
For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
what part of covering your puke with shaving cream seemed like a good idea?
Thanks for the birthday present, i had so much fun playing with it
Are you talking about my vagina?
Just think. Tomorrow you'll wake up, shower, and get your brains fucked out. That's your ice cream. Today is your peas and carrots.
He puked, did more shots, and then pissed in a drawer. We thought it was bad enough and all of a sudden...boom-clothes come off and he passes out with slippers and a styrofoam hat on and a guitar hero guitar in hand pretending he was slash.
He crawled outside into the bushes to throw up. He's just laying there now but he says he'll be ready to come home if we just give him five
facebook is just a cold reminder of all the times other bitches won my hookups
Would you like to get an apartment bong? It can be like our pet and we can give it a name.
My penis has like 3 people bidding on it
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
Not sure how my purse ended up in the bushes last night... Or why there was a noodle strainer in the toilet.
I wish I had a tail.
Why?
...why not?
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