remind me to tell you what i found stuck to me this morning
I was preparing to do my walk of shame shirtless, but then I found my sweater, wallet and keys neatly piled under a tree in the park.
Just helped a homeless man panhandle outside of Wawa, made him $6.31. Where are you?
Dating Detox Day 5: had to go out and buy new batteries. this may be harder than I thought
We proceeded to buy tattoos from the dollar store and interpretive dance to of monsters and men, it's safe to say he's my new fuck buddy
I asked if anyone's pants felt wet on the bottom, like a half hour after mine did. I had just peed my pants i had gotten so high no biggie
We went from zero to drunk tank in 45 minutes.
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
I'll send you pictures of my nipples so you don't feel left out.
Well he wouldn't kiss me so I made out with a German girl, took a shot with my boss, and I think I sprained my ankle. It was a quiet Sunday for me.
should we try and roll a cross joint since its good friday? you know, for jesus
All the doctor said was why
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
Just deepthroated a hot dog. Thinking of you
You kept saying, "please sir, can I have some more."
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