i just puked in front of my entire floor a girl on crutches asked iof i needed help hahaaa fuck ima damn fool
So I'm eating my burger minding my own business, when the guy next to me starts up a conversation. Seemed normal at first, stocks, bonds, etc...then he said...and I quote "I can push a bowling-ball up a flight of stairs with my tongue." As I awkwardly laughed he broke out "I bet you I could bite the head off of a rabbit."
It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
The liquor store wont accept checks from us anymore.
Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.
hanging out with you guys is like living the wikipedia entry for drugs...not sure i can handle that tonight.
Apparently I told the girl smoking was terrible for her, and then requested it in my mouth.
Also when i was high i would close my eyes and see a puppy on a grill having pancake batter poured on it.... And for whatever reason it was fucking hilarious.
Well going home with a Ralph Lauren model helped me get over him real fuckin' quick. Would recommend it for all women going through breakups
Medically speaking as your gynecologist and your girlfriend, that is not a rash.
And we're breaking up
I will have to bone him sometime between now and July so he will move all my shit again
I just drank beer out of an old Vicodin bottle hoping to catch some residue. That's how finals week is going
I'm playing trivia and drinking margaritas so now is not a good time.
He finished and he wasn't even totally hard. He actually came without a boner.
HOW IS THAT EVEN POSSIBLE.
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
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