Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
I feel like if your cat could talk she would call me a cunt.
i hate when u poo a lot and when u wipe theres no poopy residue on the TP. it makes me feel like my butt hole is hiding something from me. just had 2tell sum1.
You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
She ordered a salad and a budweiser. I love her.
I just banged two guys while dressed like an angel. I love this holiday.
It's shit like that that makes me wish being deaf was contagious
2 rounds of irish car bombs have already been taken to your 5 year sober anniversary
Are they engaged or just dating? Girlfriends come and go but the memory of sex at the pool last forever.
Drunk Jeff aka Dreff thinks he's about 3x cooler than be really is and about 100x better at dancing than he really is
Can we talk about the fact that a stranger is doing a line of coke off our living room table right now?
You want to know how I feel? I feel like Cady Heron pushed me in front of a bus last night.
Is it unhealthy for me to do shots of pinnacle by myself in my apartment right now? Asking for a friend
I think I am just gonna marry that lesbian. She is more of a respectful gentleman than any of the guys I've slept with.
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