WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
he just kept going up to random asian girls and yelling at them for breaking up the beatles
so whenever I text yeah my phone automatically corrects it to yeahhhheeehhyeahyeahh .. too much party in the USA?
just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
They want to listen to Lady Gaga while they puke.
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
So we went to home depot to buy supplies to build a beer bong but ended up buying an office water cooler that were going to put vodka in
I don't know how I'm boarding the plane tomorrow. I have my car registration.
And I can taste the vodka through my ears. Good god.
I'm so bored right now i'm literally Googleing all the possible ways to get high with household items as my mom is sitting in front of me..
Don't underestimate her when she starts going by "the vodka queen"
Oh you have a half-brother? Why that's right up my alley! Let's cause family strife
Tearing families apart since 2011.
If kinky sex was an Olympic sport they would be playing the anthem for me as we speak.
I just had to beg some random guy to help me climb through your porch window since the door was locked. FYI...i hear you having sex in there. You could of at least taken a break to unlock the damn door. WTF!!!
I woke up under the stretchy sheet like the corners were still stuck under the bed. I had to wiggle the corners off in order to get up. I was trapped. how did that happen
Randomize
