Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
I almost took home a boy from the bar last night, till i realized he was not speaking drunk, he was from another country and didnt know english. that could have been an awkward morning.
dollar beers will do that to you.
that would combine my 3 fave things. christmas funfetti and paul simon
just saw a midget ride a motorized cooler into the liquor store. i'm gonna follow him home.
I just commented on the education level of his penis.
Um, you were throwing up the shocker symbol in front of all of the wedding guests during the best man's speech. No wonder the groom thinks we're bad
"willing to pay anyone fun whos willing to hang out and laugh at my jokes while my friends are MIA" is this to desperate?
Dude you asked your tattoo if it wanted to go swimming
I never want to do this again, I'm going to chew off several fingers and apply for disability
Have you ever just woke up in the morning and felt pregnant
SO DRUNK
PUKED IN DRIVEWAY
TELL PARENTS SORRY
If more people understood that brunch is at 3pm the world would be a better place because you don't have to wake up early. Breakfast food is important
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
Don't ask but i need a priest, a calzone, a litre of gravy, and exactly 7 oreos
And a bag of nachos
Randomize
