her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
question: does your pee smell like mojitos at all?
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
he used a semicolon in his bootycall text, of course he's not gonna go down on me.
i say over christmas we have a beer pong competition with the cousins and see who really has the best genes in the family.
wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
they started a semi-successful rumor that toby keith died. who says fraternities don't have goals
What color are my eyes?
Ummmm... 34 C?
He made a fake guest pass that was just a note card with "I'm here. Me." written in sharpie, and tried to convince the security guard it was real.
Just remembered seeing jalepenos in my vomit last night. Reminded me to thank you for sharing your queso with me. You're a good friend.
We are hot boxing the gondola
I hate everything.
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
He kept saying I needed to go to the hospital and it just made me want to call him a pussy so I went to bed
Don't be alarmed when we finally get naked and I let out a WOOHOO!!!
I had sex with him for the first time drunk, dressed in a toddler overall tutu costume, at 2pm. Horrible start.
Randomize
