i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
My professor is talking about sperm and all I can think about is my mouth
I'm pretty sure this all started when I found a vibrator in my mom's sock drawer and had my first orgasm when I was ten...
I was giving him a handjob and he commented that he loved my nailpolish....I'm destined to die a fag hag
apparently he couldn't remember my name so he refereed to me as whats-her-boobs and everyone knew that it was me he was talking about
Ladystoner tip: if eyes are bloodshot, lime green eyeliner makes them appear less red. its basic artt.
I gave an inspirational speech to a bum and called a bride ugly at her wedding reception.
You screamed 'no, YOU put some pants on' at a cop. I pretended not to know you.
Dude, nobody just eats a banana these days. This chick wanted it. She wanted to get down with Charlie Brown.
I was high last night eating a fudge bar and making eggs with toast and corned beef hash for a 2 am snack and my dad asked what I was and the only reply I could think of was "I'm an adult."
No lie. I was hooking up with a former football player at UT and mid-hookup I yelled "I'M FRATERNIZING WITH THE ENEMY"
I achieved maximum drunk last night. It was pretty extreme. Woke up on a couch, outside, in a suit
I can't. I mean he's hot, but there's really nothing else there
You just said he's hot
NO YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND
Slept on the bathroom floor again. I hope when I turn 28 I’ll stop doing that
Chasing shots with airborne.. Gonna get rid of my sickness and my soberness.
Randomize
