But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
Should you consider yourself out of control when everyone at the party is cheering you on while you're puking, and on the last heave you act like you're rolling dice right before the finale???
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
So you think it's my fault? I didn't give you the 10 shots you took nor make you eat the brownies we made... btw, i found your engagement ring, it was in the last brownie you wouldn't let me have while dragging me to my room.
She actually was beyond drunk but she for some reason kept calling herself a demigod and made me drive her to a bookstore
You got her pregnant one week before your vasectomy? You couldn't wait one week to cheat on me?
For context, I was hiding under the pong table mooing at everyone by that point.
things I never thought I would say vol. 24 "Bagpipes just remind me that my relationship is over"
I totally almost forgot you fucked that guy. St. Patty's bar crawls always have a drawback.
Wow has his pick up routine ever gotten bad. He is trying to use cheese as a way to flirt with the waitress
Oh man, he played the Harvarti cheese card and it didn't work. Now he is flailing
Tell him "come over but don't bring a flaccid dick"
Wear something tight
We had sex to beyonce's "drunk in love" and then he order me pizza. It was perf
Sharknado 3 is going to bring us to alcoghol poisonign
COME TO THE TOP OF THE MOUNTAIN AND I WILL GIVE YOU MY SAGE ADVICE.
That was the first time ive ever slept with a girl with a q in her name
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